you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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