Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
