hotel room ftw
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
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