I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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