please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
nutella sex= disaster
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
