Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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