You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Randomize