R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
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I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
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I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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