oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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