It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
