I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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