Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
