Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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