This is not my ceiling
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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