you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
