he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
