Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Ladies don't puke and tell
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
