Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
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Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
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I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
soo... how was my night?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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