Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(513): View more from Ohio

some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page

Fav 37 1292 4461
share tweet
(516): View more from New York

You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.

Fav 17 1345 4076
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(443): View more from Maryland

There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.

Fav 42 2108 6964
share tweet
(616): View more from Michigan

I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D

Fav 8 2824 794
share tweet
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(443): View more from Maryland

I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"

Fav 18 2532 1323
share tweet
(808): View more from Hawaii

Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday

Fav 11 1980 895
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(707): View more from California

New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice

Fav 6 898 1448
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(613): View more from Ontario

Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.

Fav 0 484 707
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(360): View more from Washington

Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.

Fav 1 44 13
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT