Dual....:-)
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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