it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Two words: nipple clamps
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