I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
