I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
