Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Randomize
