Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
ugly people sure do ruin things
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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