problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
