So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
