RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
