Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
