im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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