Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
It's just like the Real World with babies
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
