You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.