you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
