so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I deserve this hangover.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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