you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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