The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
