normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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