Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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