woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
