Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.