you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Just puked most of my soul out..
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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