I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
