You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
