you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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