Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
