so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
