do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
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you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
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It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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