Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Green mimosas i think yes
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
