NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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