my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
